Rate the last film with your terrible opinions

I don't remember seeing Lost World. Came out in a time where I wasn't watching mamy films. Hmm.

JP3 is actually one that I've grown to like quite a lot over time. It's a lovely lean horror thriller with some quite creepy moments (see: aviary). I don't think I liked it a great deal in the cinema but a couple of viewings later I like it enough so that it's probably second to JP1 in my own personal list.

While I enjoyed the first Jurassic World the two sequels were bloody awful and the premise of dinosaurs being loose around the world was completely wasted in the last film, the stupid fucking bugs were the real threat in that and it was incredibly lame.

At least Malta probably made a fair amount of cash from the stupid shite that was filmed on the island so that's nice for them. When I think of dinosaurs attacking people in a city environment I don't imagine a motorcycle chase.

I didn't mind Lost world.
You take out the daughter and the dumb gymnastics bit and it instantly gains an extra point or two.

Tea Leoni easily plays the worst character from the original trilogy.

She is utterly pointless but it I don't think removing her makes any real difference to my enjoyment. 

Every single one of the action sequences in JP1 absolutely bangs still, they're lean and terrifying and you care about the characters. We're stuck in a car and there's a T rex, we're stuck in the kitchen and there's a raptor(s), we're on a a big fence. The ones in lost world feel storyboarded*, they're convoluted and messy and too long. 

I think I've only seen JP3 once so I'm quite looking forward to it. I went to see JW in the cinema and found it incredibly bland, didnt bother with the others but I'm now intrigued to see how bad they can get.

*I know everything is storyboarded, but they feel like they had way too much time to fiddle and tweak and try and come up with new ideas.

Yeah, I vividly remember walking out of the cinema thinking it was actually quite a dark ending as despite being reunited with their son, there was no way those two weren't going to jail. They were responsible for several deaths.

Also the universal dinosaur translator was dumb. It was the film where the raptors began their inexorable slide from absolutely terrifying to noble companions.

The biggest criticism I have of TLW really is that, despite working very hard to make the film tense and exciting, I don't think Spielberg's heart was in it. IIRC he felt he owed the film to the honchos at Universal (he might have literally owed them it tbh).

Godzilla Minus One

I don't know who gave it such a shit score but they obviously don't know what they're talking about. Brilliant.

JP3 is the worst one for me by a country mile, mostly because of the kid with the strongest plot armor in the world.

“This is T-Rex pee? How did you get it?”
“I RAN UP TO HIM AND KICKED HIM IN THE BALLS AND SAID PISS FOR ME MOTHERFUCKER”

The boring reason is it's a highly contentious subject amongst palaeontologists, largely because of the poor soft (hard, fnarrr) tissue record.

Mind you, I've struggled with the franchise ever since they showed a pterosaur landing in a tree; don't get me started...

JP is ok but I'm more into Billy and The Cloneasaurus.

To the rate the franchise thread!

I'm surprised that Jaws hasn't come back around, although I guess films like The Meg sort of fill that gap.

Gareth Edwards is doing a Jurassic Park soft reboot thing. I at least have faith he’ll do something cool.